Thoughts

I can't sleep. Thinking about the possible outcomes of tomorrows news is making me incredibly anxious. There are many things on my mind, but the possibility of my husband not coming home for a while is what's making my sanity lose its grip. That, and the fact that I am not as dumb as people seem to think I am.

I am pretty intelligent. Not just book smarts, but I am damn good at reading people. I am not oblivious, and I will not make myself a part of some petty high school ...well..bullshit.

I have obviously been through enough in my lifetime - not to mention what I've been through in the last year - that I do not have ONE OUNCE of energy left in me to fight with someone over their own stupidity and ignorance.

Yea, I am different. I am weird. That doesn't make me a bad person. So, if you decide you can't "handle" me...that's your loss. Honestly, I feel sorry for you. I hope one day you grow up and realize life isn't all butterflies and rainbows. Life hurts. It can be painful. It can absolutely SUCK. I think I have dealt with it quite well. If you don't, sorry. You will learn one day, but I won't be around to say I told you so.

Anyway, my prayers go out tonight for my husband and all the others currently in the same situation. I pray that whatever happens is the absolute BEST outcome for everyone. I want him home more than anything, but only God knows what is best. I just selfishly pray that involves him coming home, ASAP.

I miss you, Adam. I can't wait to see that smiling face again.